Wandering Roots - August 2024 + a week
Two mulberry trees, no permanent abode.
Welcome to Wandering Roots, a monthly newsletter from me, A Woman Who Wanders.
After buying a house at the beginning of June, I had a slight wobble regarding my identity (online and otherwise.)
Am I still a woman who wanders? I asked, and it turns out that I am, but I am also, now, a woman who roots. This newsletter will offer updates on my progress, as I marry my wandering and rooting together.
You can expect to read about:
The ongoing journey of adjusting to life in rural Italy (learning the language, adapting to the culture)
The renovation of my Italian house
Mothering abroad (and in general)
Learning how to grow plants (lots of them edible, I hope)
How I’m figuring out a makeshift career while I don’t have a strong proficiency in the language that surrounds me
Plus recommendations for things I’m enjoying, in Italy, and online.
Here We Go Round the Mulberry Bush…
Last month I mentioned how we’d ordered some mulberry trees to mark the corners of our field. On the first day of August two baby mulberry trees arrived in the post.
Our first trip out to the field was somewhat disastrous adventurous. Firstly, my husband thought he’d take a different route to see if we could get closer to the plot and save us from trekking through the sticky heat with two small children. We couldn’t.
Once we reached the spot we realised we were very poorly equipped. Our tools weren’t appropriate, it was already too late in the morning and the sun was high in the sky. This is as far as we got:
When we returned we had more snacks for the kids, better tools for Muhammad and plenty of mosquito repellent.
The Italian House
In August the house went through that stage where it starts to look so much worse before it can look better. We’re talking holes in the wall, pits in the floor and a gutted bathroom.
The good news is that there is a kitchen coming together. Just seeing this offers so much encouragement that this is a place I could live in.
Moving Out Without Moving In…
We left the rented house that we have lived in for the last 14 months on the last day of August. The house we needed to move to was not quite livable (see above) so we got to experience the joy of an extended transition period. Beginning to root was feeling a lot like wandering…
That familiar old sensation arose; I just want to go home, but I have nowhere to go. Do you know the feeling?
We were generously hosted in the studio of our new nextdoor neighbours. We had a shower, a kitchen and a bedroom floor covered in very comfortable mattresses. Curled up with my kids we all slept extremely well which reduces all problems by about 98%.
(Not) Speaking Italian
In all this movement my ability to speak any, even very broken Italian, completely disappeared. This is a familiar pattern that I have noticed over the years. My ability to speak Italian has a lot less to do with grammatical structures and correct conjugations and a lot more to do with the capacity of my nervous system.
Despite being pretty confident and outspoken in many environments, my natural disposition is an introverted one. As a young child my mother once found me cramped in the coat cupboard because I needed some ‘space’ from the family. Socialising and small talk takes some energy for me and it always feels vaguely threatening to start off with.
Chit chat, or even basic requests for what I need, in another language, while in temporary accommodation, with two children is a complete assault on my nerves. That’s why I couldn’t speak a word of Italian at the end of August into the first week of September. Not because I’m a lazy foreigner who makes no effort to integrate as my nasty inner-critic would have me believe.
Have you noticed a correlation between how activated your nervous system is and your ability to perform a skill?
Lest You Think It’s All Doom and Gloom…
I’ve been eating so well. I don’t mean healthily.
If you’re going to put your nervous system under huge amounts of stress, there are worse places to be than the Glorious Land of Comfort Carbs.
s
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Anyone else familiar with wanting to go home? But not being able to? And instead just regressing in all your skills and abilities so that you feel like an incompetent baby-adult?
Anyone else familiar with the remedy of pizza and pasta and gelato (and its long list of contraindications…?)
I love you guys. Thanks for reading.
Until next time, keep wandering, in body, heart or mind.
I loved reading this so much. And makes me extra sad we did not get a chance to talk more when we lived close. I had no idea you also got so much land - how cool! I can very much relate to the whole roots question. I guess for me, I am rooted in my family, the house is just the container holding the plant :-).
All of this looks so amazing (and challenging, not gonna lie haha)!! Here for the updates!